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10 Gentle Decluttering Rules to Help You Let Go

These decluttering rules evolved when I was in the midst of decluttering for good. Because it wasn’t the first time I was decluttering my home or , I knew I had to watch out for some obstacles. I couldn’t expect to approach things the same way and get different results. I had to change the way I change. Creating decluttering rules along the way helped me have more fun and be easier on myself when it was hard to let go, or when I thought things weren’t progressing as fast as I wanted them to.

These decluttering rules aren’t rules about which room to start with or how long to declutter each day. The rules don’t include specific decluttering methods, or tell you what you should or shouldn’t own. Instead, these rules of decluttering are here to 


  • help you let go
  • encourage you feel good about decluttering
  • help you create space
  • inspire you keep going when it feels like stuff is winning

From duplicates, keepsakes, unwanted gifts, folders of paperwork and baskets, bins or storage containers, you may be feeling like you have too much stuff. The decision-making required when it comes to what to save, trash or bring to a donation center can be overwhelming. Allow these gentle decluttering rules to help you ease the overwhelm. Keep simplifying the process and check in on how you are feeling. Don’t feel pressure to declutter your entire home. Start with a drawer or kitchen counter instead.

10 Decluttering Rules to Help You Let Go of Your Stuff

Choose the three decluttering rules you need the most right now and use them as reminders that you want so much more than piles of stuff 
 in your home and in your life. Think of these gentle decluttering rules not as restrictive but instead as inspiring and supportive. Whether you are decluttering for the first time or the fiftieth, find a few of these rules that are helpful for you. Put them on a sticky note or somewhere to inspire your decluttering.

1. Why is more important than how.

This first decluttering rule makes all the difference. We all know how to declutter (and if you aren’t sure, here’s a list of articles to help), but knowing why will make it stick. Why do you want to live with less? Why are you making space — what are you making room for in your life? When you shift your mindset, the actions and habits can follow with more ease. As obstacles arise (as they do), instead of giving up, revisit why this is important to you, take a break and come back.

2. One thing at a time.

You didn’t clutter up your home overnight and you aren’t going to become clutter free overnight. This decluttering process is a step by step, inch by inch, scarf by book by measuring cup process. If you place five things, one thing at a time in a box each day to donate, by the end of a month you’ll be 150 items lighter and by the end of a year, 1825 things lighter. Your one thing at a time efforts will lead to a clutter-free life. During your consistent process, for more progress and momentum. A little burst here and there can be fun, but if it’s exhausting, slow down.

3. This is not a race.

Slow and steady change will be more sustainable than the fast and furious version you’ve attempted before. (Here are 10 slow and steady strategies.) There’s no benefit in comparing either. Just because you read about someone who decluttered their life or embraced minimalism overnight doesn’t mean that pace or is right for you. You have to consider your home, your family, and your heart. Drop the competing and comparing and make this an adventure, not a race. Curiosity and consistency will serve you better than stress and speed. When you feel like you are falling behind, remember this decluttering rule.

4. If everything matters, nothing matters.

In some you may feel like all the stuff is important, that it all has meaning and that each thing matters. Remind yourself that if everything matters, nothing matters. It can’t all have your love and attention. Even still, letting go of things that have meaning may be hard. Find ways to create a bridge between holding on to it and letting go of it. For instance, hide the stuff you aren’t sure about. See if you notice it’s gone. Some separation will do wonders in breaking your emotional attachment. When you let go of what doesn’t matter you can give more of yourself to what does.

5. Keep your eyes on your own stuff.

If you’re worried about how you will live a life with less stuff when your spouse has hoarding tendencies, or you have children, come back to your own stuff. That will probably keep you occupied for a while. It’s tempting to start with other people and other people’s stuff because that’s easier than letting go of your own stuff. Instead of trying to get everyone on board with decluttering, demonstrate your desire to live with less stuff by living with less of your own stuff first.

6. Small progress is still progress.

Celebrate your tiny steps and small wins as you go instead of waiting until the end. This decluttering rule is a reminder that every big change is the result of hundreds of tiny steps and they all count. Some of the changes you may be making as you simplify your life take time. It took me a few years to declutter my whole house. If I waited until I was completely clutter-free to notice my accomplishments and celebrate my progress, I would have lost momentum and felt defeated. Instead of focusing on how long it was going to take to get it all done, I got to celebrate when I decluttered my junk drawer, , a and other small areas.

7. Less is not nothing.

No one said you had to get rid of it all. You decide what you want in your life. Keep things that add value to your life and the stuff you enjoy. When it doesn’t add value anymore, or you stop enjoying it, let it go. There is a place in between ALL stuff and NO stuff that will allow you to not only shift your focus from defining who you are by what you own but also, to enjoy your favorite things. It’s your simplicity, your home, your life. You make the rules. Knowing that , be gentle with yourself. Go easy, take tiny steps, and lots of breaks as you work towards a more spacious, relaxed life.

8. Just in case means never.

The just in case excuse for holding on is a messy combination of fear and procrastination. We hold on because we aren’t quite ready to let go but we rarely use or enjoy the just in case stuff we keep. Take a look in the back of your closet, in the junk drawer, under the sink or in boxes in the garage or attic and it’s clear that just in case means never. Admitting that just in case means never allows us to stop procrastinating and invites us to let go and stop living in fear of not having enough. When we say goodbye to just in case, we can start living and giving in more meaningful ways.

9. Holding on to stuff is harder than letting it go.

You may be struggling with guilt from an emotional attachment to your stuff. It’s painful to constantly be thinking about the stuff you know you need to let go of. It’s emotionally draining too. Letting go of stuff may feel hard, but holding on is harder. You have to hold on to your stuff every single day. You hold on by paying for items with your money, time, attention, and emotion. You only have to let go of it once.

10. This is love.

This is the most important rule. Declutter for love and to find love. You may discover what you want most in life or a hobby you love or a close connection you’ve been neglecting when make space in your life. When you begin to declutter and live with less for reasons that matter to you, you understand that this isn’t about organized sock drawers or clean counters. Simplicity is the way back to love. It’s the way back to people you love, work you love, and a life you love. Use these gentle decluttering rules to help let go of clutter and to make more space in your home and your heart.

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